Undoing a long walk down the safe road

Flash back to a couple years ago. I was burned out to the max. I had done everything I was supposed to do, and I had the life that I was supposed to want. A great wife, a beautiful home, a successful business, and plenty of money. 

But I was miserable, had no motivation, and I couldn't figure out why. All I knew was that what I was doing wasn't working, and that something had to change. 

But I've never been the type who is content with just putting my head down and grinding on. I want the truth, at any cost. And off I went in search of it. 

Did I need a different career? That just seemed like another path to a dead end. A vacation? That might help for a little while, but it didn't address the core issue. More money wouldn't get me anything but more problems, right Biggie? 

What I needed was to reconnect with myself, and to start living for myself. So after much reflection, I finally realized what had gone wrong. 

The Decision

It was my first semester of college. Away from my small town home for the first time, I took in the world and wanted all of it. At least I wanted all of the materialistic parts of it. Really, I wanted girls, and I saw the rich kids at school picking up more girls. 

But my passion was music. I discovered music in high school and in many ways, it rescued me. I grew up in a small town and never really fit in until I found music. Singing was the first thing I was ever really good at, and through it, I felt like I belonged to something for the first time in my life.

I had offers for scholarships from some pretty prestigious music schools, but opted to pursue a music degree at a liberal arts school a few hours from home instead. I wasn't ready to go from the farm to Boston. 

And a couple of weeks into college, I changed my major from music to business. I dropped my theory classes and enrolled in accounting. 

Twenty years later, I found myself discontented and searching back through my memories, looking for where I went wrong. And I found my answer. It was there, talking to a friend about my decision on the sidewalk outside of Hvidsten Hall on the Concordia College campus. 

I realized that in that moment I changed the entire path of my life, and it led me down a long road in the wrong direction. And so, I committed to do what it took to get back to a place where I could make music. This website is a manifestation of that day. And so is the music that I'm writing. 

Taking Back My Passion

I don't know where this all will end up. I'm not trying to control the outcome. But I know that music will take a central role in my life going forward, and that I'm going to work at it like its my job. I'm going to put in the same effort I put into taking the "safe" path, and I'm going to see where it takes me. 

I hope you'll come along on the journey with me. 

 

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